Blocks Make Me Want To Play with the Greats

This morning it happened.  I was muted.  This afternoon I was blocked.  Many reasons swim through my head:

• Was it following Peter? (The last straw at least).
• Was it getting carried away with the Young Drunk Punk guessing challenge?
• Was it replying to and favoriting most of her tweets?
• Was it some of my more silly comments?  
• If any apply, it's likely a combination.
• I hope the seal gag didn't play a huge role.  

Honestly, if I didn't like someone's aggressive attention, I would have blocked them within a week.

I know it's not entirely just me who's getting the cold shoulder but I think I'm the main "offender."  I'm at least one of them.  I feel bad if my association has compromised the connections others have to Allie.  I shared these thoughts with one individual (who has also been recently ignored like me but for a shorter period of time) and wish him the best.  There's also the possibility that she was just generally too embroiled in social media and is cleaning house (by whatever means necessary).  But why can't I be part of the clean house?  

Although I was already on Twitter for minor reasons, she was the reason I took my tweeting to the next level.  To me, it was a tool to to reach out.

What she doesn't know is that I was tracking her through a third party service, so I still get her tweets.  Are you kidding me?  Do you think I would just monitor the Twitter feeds endlessly?  I did also catch up by visiting her profile page but even that would require logging in with no certainty of new stuff.  No, I get emailed her tweets.  Then I would try to impress her, help her, or otherwise do something good for, and supportive of, her. My tweet activity is little compared to the impact of my presence if I got my wish to spend time with her.  That's my perception. 

I set out to capture her interest.  And I did make good impressions at first.  It's hard to accept that I ruined those.  I still get mixed signals even after the block.

I want to believe that she was disengaging and now pushing me away because she actually likes me and is trying hard to resist temptation.  That's what I want.  My attention is just a pin-drop in the flood of attention she gets from social media, so I doubt that I was really that over the line (with possible exception of yesterday).    

I recently put out my more critical thoughts about her make-up use and her skills.  I shared these because I'm trying to encourage her to be the best she can be.  People who just butter her up all the time aren't helping her the most.  I compliment her most of the time but I occasionally challenge her.  That's healthy and that shows that I don't over-romanticize her.  I see her as a real person that can improve. 

I hope she reexamines her decision and lets me back in with some friendly guidelines.  I hope she lets me in for real in the near future.  It's nice to see her very happy today unlike yesterday.  Of course, I wish to be a part of it: that would be even nicer.  I want to know, point by point, why this isn't good for her?!  Why I'm not good?

I know she never asked for any of this.  However, here I am.